is your mom at the bar?
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
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