The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
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