you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
