So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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