i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
