I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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