i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
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