bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
