You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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