Kiss
Puke
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
