Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
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