everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
We are all done wearing pants today
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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