They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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