I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
