How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
