For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Randomize
