I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Randomize
