Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
