Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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