bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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