That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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