The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
ttyl tear gas
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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