she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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