Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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