pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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