Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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