so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize
