I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize