Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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