if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
