i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
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