I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
