she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
23 Gruesome Scientific Facts That Will Make You Squirm
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Randomize
