Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.