True but thats because hes a fetus.
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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