just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
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