You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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