i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I wish you could order shots online.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Randomize