Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Randomize
