This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize