Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
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