I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize