In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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