Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
