is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
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I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
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We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV