his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
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It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
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Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did