on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
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