at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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