you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
