hotel room ftw
Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize