I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
We named our party play list daddy issues
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize