I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Im part way to drunk.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Randomize